DAMARK CATALOG STORIES

Memories Of An 80 Year Old

Damark catalog stories

By Lee Meyer

When I decided it was time for me to give up driving semi coast-to-coast, it was a very large decision.

First of all, what would I do for a job, and what type of work was I qualified for.

I had remodeled a building in DeGraff and made it into a wood work shop. I also read an article saying something that surprised me. The article said that people my age who owned computers, only used 1/10th of 1 percent of the capacity of their computer.

Combining both my woodworking hobby with this new computer waste knowledge I learned, I decided to try to increase my knowledge in both of these things.

I decided to enroll in a woodworking class and also a computer class at Minneapolis Community & Technical College, which is located on Hennepin Avenue in Minneapolis, MN.

Since I was going to be spending five days a week in Minneapolis, which is pretty much like being gone a week or more as a cross-country truck driver, it was not such a big difference.

Being gone to Minneapolis for five days and also taking a couple of classes, it also meant I needed to find a paying job, and find a place to live in Minneapolis.

First of all I found a one room place in an apartment building, which was a walk-up, fourth floor location.

Next I found an interesting job at a catalog merchandising company named Damark. Damark came into existence in 1987 and operated until the early 2,000’s.

Damark mailed catalogs filled with all kinds of merchandise to people all over the United States. Each catalog had an identification number for the person receiving the catalog.

This job at Damark was an interesting job, something I didn’t even realize existed. I joined about 150 other workers, all of us sitting at a desk looking at a computer, wearing a headset, taking incoming telephone calls from people all over the United States who received the Damark catalog.

This column will be about some of the interesting phone calls I received while working at Damark.

When I received a telephone call, the first thing asked was for the customer to give me the identification number on their catalog. Some people didn’t ever realize there was an identification number on their catalog. When the customer gave me their identification number, I entered it into my computer and the name and address of the customer, any and all previous orders they had previously placed, and the last four numbers on their credit card.

As you may suspect talking with from 50 to 80 people a day, some interesting and funny things happen.

First of all when we placed the identification number into the computer and saw the name of the person on the phone, the first thing we would say was, Hi Mr., or Mrs.

One day I received a call from a lady with a last name I could not figure out how to pronounce, without using a very bad or swear word. As I am delaying my talk back to her, trying to figure out how to pronounce her last name, I heard her voice in my headset saying, “You’re right, I really loved him!” What a great sense of humor, and we both had a laugh.

Another phone call came from a man, and when I entered his identification number, a familiar name appeared, however when I said, “Are you related to Bryant?” I received a rather stern reply saying, “I am Gregory Gumbel, and most people refer to Bryant as my younger brother!” I sensed a little bit of arrogance from Gregory Gumbel.

Another call came in from a lady who had a terrible time talking, which I thought might be due to emphysema. When I entered her catalog number into my computer, it turned out to be Helen Crump, which was the television name of the actress who played Andy Griffith’s girlfriend on the old Andy Griffith Show with Don Knotts.

I thought it would be kind of humorous to mention this information to the phone caller, so I said, “You have a famous name, the same name as Andy Griffith’s girlfriend on the old television show.”

Obviously this was not new information to the Helen Crump who had called me, because she said back to me in her slow, stuttering voice, “I’m so damn sick of hearing about that!”

Another call came in from a male customer in the Boston, MA area. After the caller gave me his identification number and I saw his name and address, he said to me, “Can you hold a little, I have another call?” I said no problem, thinking he was going to put me on hold to take another phone call.

The customer just started talking on another phone, and I could hear his whole conversation, finding out he was talking to another friend, and they were talking about a bachelor party they had both been to the night before, and it sounded like some exciting bachelor party, complete with a couple of dancing girls.

When this customer came back on the phone, forgetting that he had already given me his identification number, I thought I would have a little fun.

I asked him for his identification number, which I already had, so when he gave me his number, I said to him, “Hi Jerry, I was at the bachelor party with you last night.

He said, “Yes, wasn’t that a great time. Wait a minute you are in Minneapolis, MN, right?” I said yes, but I heard your conversation with your friend, and thought you might enjoy my comment. He really laughed, and then said, “Well you missed a great party!”

A lady called one day, and her name was Mrs. Roy Orbison, the singer’s second wife. When I looked at her previous orders on my computer, I could see that she had purcashed a lot of Oriental rugs in the past.

When Mrs. Orbison ordered about four more of these Oriental rugs, and they were not cheap. I said to her, “You must really like these Oriental rugs”. Mrs. Orbison said, “I enjoy giving them away as gifts”. Nice to have her as a friend.

You can probably tell I did enjoy my time taking telephone calls while working at Damark Catalog Sales.

Lee Meyer currently lives in DeGraff, Minnesota but has ties to the Morgan area. Some of his columns are based on his memories of Morgan and time spent there when he was young.

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